{"id":287,"date":"2025-10-27T13:26:26","date_gmt":"2025-10-27T13:26:26","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/sajeve-thomas-md.medoncmd.com\/proyect\/?p=287"},"modified":"2025-10-27T14:51:15","modified_gmt":"2025-10-27T14:51:15","slug":"the-third-space-finding-balance-between-work-home-and-spirituality","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/sajeve-thomas-md.medoncmd.com\/proyect\/the-third-space-finding-balance-between-work-home-and-spirituality\/","title":{"rendered":"The Third Space: Finding Balance Between Work, Home, and Spirituality"},"content":{"rendered":"\n

Just a quick update before diving in: I’ll be starting at AdventHealth on December 1st, 2025, and I\u2019m really looking forward to this next chapter. If you\u2019ve noticed a lull in posts lately, it\u2019s because I\u2019ve been buried in board review\u2014studying for my hematology recertification\u2014while also ramping up with my wife on our first franchise location, and managing some real estate projects that demanded attention. I\u2019m hoping to get back to sharing more medically focused content in the weeks ahead.<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

That said, this week has also been a moment of pause and reflection. A dear friend lost his father\u2014someone I respected greatly\u2014and another colleague recently experienced what looks like a profound family loss. My thoughts and prayers are with them. These quiet reminders of life\u2019s fragility have also shaped the reflections that follow.<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

This past weekend was full\u2014of events, conversations, reconnections, and reminders.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

It began with my first time attending FLASCO<\/strong> here in Orlando\u2014the Florida Society of Clinical Oncology. I\u2019ve been to plenty of conferences over the years, but this one stood out. Not just for the quality of the sessions, but for the depth of the interactions. I had the chance to reconnect with colleagues from across the state, and engage meaningfully with industry partners, MSLs, former mentors, and friends. The setting was beautiful, and the spirit of collaboration was energizing.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

From FLASCO, the weekend flowed into the evening with the IACC Gala<\/strong>. More reconnections\u2014old friends, new faces, colleagues, and mentors. But one moment, in particular, stood out: a conversation with a former senior executive from my prior hospital. I hesitate to call him a mentor, though he very well could be. He\u2019s someone I\u2019ve always held in the highest<\/em> regard\u2014a thoughtful leader and a role model of composure and professionalism.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Years ago, I walked into his office for the first time, burdened with questions and concerns around an issue I can\u2019t even recall now. He had never met me prior to that visit, but I had seen him lead from afar and held a high level of respect for him\u2014someone whose reputation for integrity and steadiness preceded any formal introduction.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

I don\u2019t remember the specifics of that meeting. What I do remember is what I saw\u2014his shelves lined with books on emotional intelligence<\/strong>, leadership, and healthcare management\u2014and what I heard:<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\n

\u201cNever love the hospital\u2014it\u2019ll never love you back.\u201d<\/strong><\/p>\n<\/blockquote>\n\n\n\n

At the time, that statement landed with quiet force. I\u2019d spent years reading voraciously\u2014about oncology, clinical trials, real estate investing, malpractice litigation. Anything practical, objective, strategic. Emotional intelligence? That felt like something I already had. Or so I thought.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

In the years that followed, life unfolded in ways that no textbook prepares you for. I lost my young brother-in-law. Then I lost my dad\u2014both unexpectedly. And soon after, I experienced the kind of professional losses that don\u2019t show up on paper but are just as disruptive\u2014trusted staff members reassigned or removed due to administrative decisions beyond my control.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

I remember a particularly frustrating period after losing a long-time nurse, when I had a different nurse nearly every day. Trying to care for complex cancer patients without a consistent team felt like a daily uphill battle. Layered on top of that was the isolation and upheaval of the pandemic, which fundamentally changed how I worked, how I connected, and how I coped.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

This is when the idea of the third space<\/strong> began to take root.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

The Power of the Third Space<\/strong><\/h3>\n\n\n\n

The third space, for me, is Sunday mornings<\/strong>\u2014quiet time in a church that may not reflect all my beliefs anymore, but still offers something invaluable: stillness<\/strong>.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

It could just as easily be a temple, a garden, a yoga studio… a long reflective hike. I\u2019ve done many hikes in Montana and West Virginia during locum work. The key is this: it\u2019s a space that is neither work nor home<\/em>. A space free of emails, expectations, meetings, and performance metrics. A place to simply be<\/strong>, not do<\/strong>.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

In that space, I reflect.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

I ask myself:
What did I get right this week?
What could I have done differently?
Where did I miss the mark\u2014not just with patients, but with colleagues, acquaintances, even strangers?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Sometimes I come home and tell my wife, \u201cHere\u2019s how I said it… and here\u2019s how it landed.\u201d And I know it could\u2019ve been better. Not the message, but the delivery. The tone. The awareness of who was on the receiving end.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Those who know me well\u2014my close friends\u2014probably don\u2019t worry about this. They know my heart. But acquaintances and colleagues don\u2019t always know the full story. The third space helps me remember that we\u2019re all<\/em> operating with unseen stories. And that emotional intelligence isn\u2019t about being perfect\u2014it\u2019s about being aware<\/em>. It\u2019s about examining your own reactions, regulating them when needed, and recognizing that others may be carrying burdens you can\u2019t see.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

The values I aim to live by\u2014resilience, dignity, tenacity, humility, integrity<\/strong>\u2014don\u2019t just show up one day. They\u2019re built. Practiced. Reinforced.
You become what you intentionally program yourself<\/em> to be.
And for me, that programming happens<\/em> through daily morning meditation\/journaling and being<\/em> in the third space.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Full Circle Moments<\/strong><\/h3>\n\n\n\n

What made this weekend especially meaningful was hearing directly from the same senior director\u2014someone I\u2019ve long admired\u2014that he had read my announcement blog post from some time ago and found it moving<\/strong>\u2026 fitting<\/strong>\u2026 on-point<\/strong>. That kind of affirmation, especially coming from someone who shaped the way I think about leadership, meant the world.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

To be seen by someone you admire\u2026 to know your words resonated with them? That\u2019s a full-circle moment.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

But the story didn\u2019t end there.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Later that same night, we crossed paths again\u2014this time at a friend\u2019s Halloween party. It was late, unplanned, and totally casual. But it gave us a chance to talk more, and what struck me was how much our lives had both shifted. Neither of us are at that hospital anymore. Both of us are now doing locums work<\/strong>\u2014him one week a month, me over half of this past year.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

And in that conversation, there was this quiet, shared realization:
Balance.. presence.. mindfulness matter more.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

We gave so much of ourselves to our work\u2014and sometimes we had to. But there is value in stepping back. In carving out time for the things that restore us. Whether through locums, third spaces, or late-night conversations with people who get it<\/em>, there\u2019s something profoundly healing about realizing you\u2019re not alone in rethinking how you want to live and lead.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

A Season of Reflection<\/strong><\/h3>\n\n\n\n

As we head into the holiday season, I\u2019m reminded not just of gratitude<\/em>\u2014but of presence<\/em>.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

I hope my kids grow up with their own versions of the third space\u2014places outside of school and home where they can reflect, reset, and discover who they are. Maybe they\u2019ll sit in silence. Maybe they\u2019ll write. Maybe they\u2019ll pray.
But most importantly\u2014I hope they\u2019ll learn to pause. To think. To feel. To grow.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Because growth doesn\u2019t happen by pushing harder. It happens when we slow down long enough to hear ourselves think.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

No matter where we are in life, we all face struggles\u2014personal, professional, spiritual. And there\u2019s no shortcut around them. But there is<\/em> a space for processing them. For healing. For clarity. For quiet.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

For me, that space is the third space.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

My goal, every day, is to grow a little more than I did the day before\u2014intellectually, spiritually, emotionally, physically. To be a better version of myself compared to yesterday.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

And when I walk into work (even locum work), I remind myself each morning:
Learn something. Teach something. Take care of patients and the people I work with. Then get the heck out of Dodge. Go home to what really matters.<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Because hospitals or workspaces won\u2019t love me back.
But maybe\u2014through the third space<\/strong>\u2014I\u2019ll stay grounded enough to love my people well.
And maybe\u2026 they\u2019ll love me back.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\"\"<\/figure>\n\n\n\n

\u201cAt the end of the day, this second shift is about more than just work\u2014it\u2019s about building a life with purpose. I believe in the power of showing up fully across every spoke of life\u2014career, family, health, finances, intellect, spirituality, and joy. This space is where I reflect, recalibrate, and keep striving for that delicate, worthwhile balance. I write not just to document the journey, but to remind myself\u2014and maybe you too\u2014that it\u2019s okay to want more, to give more, and to grow through every season.\u201d<\/em>\u00a0\u2014\u00a0st<\/em><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Just a quick update before diving in: I’ll be starting at AdventHealth on December 1st, 2025, and I\u2019m really looking forward to this next chapter. If you\u2019ve noticed a lull in posts lately, it\u2019s because I\u2019ve been buried in board review\u2014studying for my hematology recertification\u2014while also ramping up with my wife on our first franchise […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":293,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"om_disable_all_campaigns":false,"_monsterinsights_skip_tracking":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_active":false,"_monsterinsights_sitenote_note":"","_monsterinsights_sitenote_category":0,"_uf_show_specific_survey":0,"_uf_disable_surveys":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"categories":[8],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-287","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-family"],"aioseo_notices":[],"yoast_head":"\nThe Third Space: Finding Balance Between Work, Home, and Spirituality - The Second Shift<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"Stillness is where transformation begins.\" \/>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/sajeve-thomas-md.medoncmd.com\/proyect\/the-third-space-finding-balance-between-work-home-and-spirituality\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"The Third Space: Finding Balance Between Work, Home, and Spirituality - 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